Inspirational Song of the Week: I Believe by Blessid Union of Souls

 

Weekly I like to share a song that has inspired or comforted me at some point in my life. Sometimes they work over and over again and other times they are simply played at the right moment in time.
This week Spotify was kind enough to provide "I Believe" by Blessid Union of Souls in its #ThrowbackThursday playlist. I love checking out this list every week to see what gems they have in store. It's also entertaining trying to figure out the theme of that week's music.
Given the violent streak over the past few weeks from Paris to Mizzou to San Bernadino and everywhere in between, I felt that the lyrics to this song were especially poignant. His voice also makes a powerful statement. Read the words, listen to the rhythm, and feel the power emanating from within. It's just what I needed.
Violence is spread worldwide and there are families on the street And we sell drugs to children now oh why can't we just see That all we do is eliminate our future with the things we do today Money is our incentive now so that makes it okay
But I believe that love is the answer I believe that love will find the way


What song is inspiring you this week?

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Memories vs. Living in the Past

I have a pretty terrible memory. I've tried lots of tips & tricks over the years to help build it up, but nothing really seems to work. Some incidents stick better than others; some things I can never forget despite wanting to and others that I want to cherish forever fade faster than acceptable.

As a result I have held onto stuff and things much longer than acceptable. They are visual cues that can spark a memory or emotion of some past event. The overwhelming majority are happy memories that I want to preserve. What's interesting though is that they are not necessarily for sharing.

In recent months I have developed an intense need to purge my apartment. This transitory feeling that I've had ever since I first moved out of my parental home has followed me long enough. So I've been going through my belongings via the KonMari method. 

Simply put, the KonMari method stresses:

1. Collect all like items of a particular category (clothes, papers, kitchen items)
2. Purge everything that doesn't "spark joy" or that you use regularly
3. Only after you've completely purged, organize the remaining items

This has revolutionized my process of cleaning and helped prevent impulse buying when I am out and about.

After doing several sections of my home, I'm down to miscellaneous items and items with emotional attachment; thus my introspection. I want to make sure that I don't lose the memories by ridding myself of the physical reminder. I've debated over writing down all the memories, but know that will take a lot of time. My current plan is to photograph the item before sorting it for donation or trash and then storing the photo. I will be able to reference it and write about it at my leisure if necessary.

What's most important to me is not just ridding my home of clutter, but preventing myself from living in the past. It's nice to visit there and remember good things, but dwelling on unchangeable circumstances is unhealthy and unwise. Here's hoping I can untether myself and walk freely.

Do you have a need to clear house; physically or emotionally? What are your best strategies for success in this area?

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Inspirational Song of the Week: Shower the People by James Taylor

Weekly I like to share a song that has inspired or comforted me at some point in my life. Sometimes they work over and over again and other times they are simply played at the right moment in time.

Today I feature one of my favorite artists and one of the most moving songs that I love to concentrate on when I am having a rough day with the world.

James Taylor is beloved the world over, but no more than in North Carolina. He spent many years there and we claim him as our own, even though he also gives love to his Massachusetts home. "Shower the People" is an uplifting song that is smooth and steady. The refrain is my favorite:

Just shower the people you love with love, show them the way that you feel.

Things are gonna work out fine if you only will do as I say, just

Shower the people you love with love, show them the way you feel.

Things are gonna be much better if you only will.

If you have a few minutes, just listen and enjoy the guitar melodies. I'm sure James will make more appearances in this feature because he has been a staple in my life, but this is a good one for today.

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Facing Negativity & Rising Above: 5 Key Strategies

The worst feeling in the world is helplessness. The inability to care for something important to you can be devastating. Protection and avoidance techniques can only go so far. Sometimes negative situations just have to be faced and dealt with. How you choose to deal with them will define who you are today and who you become tomorrow.

Today was a rough day for me. I stayed up later than I should last night finalizing my final project for my last class in my graduate degree program. The morning was a bit rough, but I managed. I had prepared myself well for my presentation and while nervous, was still ready to roll.

Until I wasn't. The presentation order was changed, pushing my time slot back from the first position that I was ready to be in. Then, during my presentation, it dawned on me when I was given the 5 minute warning that I had mis-prepared. Instead of having the 15-20 minutes I was prepared for, I only had 10 total. My brain switched into high gear, my mouth went dry, and panic clawed at me. 

I survived. I made it through the presentation as best I could, skipping lots of fantastic details I had worked so hard to lay out along the way. As I sat in my chair trying to recover I realized my eyes were watering. "There was no way that this should make me cry!" my brain called out. As the next presentation started up I focused on my breathing and tried to remember my mindfulness and meditation practices.

5 Key Strategies to Facing Negativity and Rise Above It

1. Breathe! It sound so simple, but people often hold their breath without even realizing it. This breathing pattern gif is saved on my iPhone so that I can pull it up easily.
2. Focus on a repetitive practice. I finding counting to be soothing because of the predictability and pacing. It allows my brain to zero-in on a task and ward off negative emotions to allow for processing.
3. Use a "touchstone". A meditative object that has a predetermined and dedicated purpose is key to reigning in my emotions. I made a simple prayer-bead-like item. I can count the beads, roll them, or rub the Ahimsa charm. Just touching this object gives me peace and satisfaction enough to begin calming down.
4. Look to the positive. I know "looking on the bright side" is not revolutionary, but it does important work. Even though I felt like I bombed my presentation, I thought about the fact that it was over and I could not change it. I had done my best and was good with that.
5. Enlist help. Sometimes I really can't bring myself back up. That's when friends and family are important. We all hit rough patches and how we care for ourselves and others is what we give back. Helping someone and sharing the load makes for faster recovery work.

These are not the easiest things to remember in stressful times. It has taken my several years to realize the worth and value of some of these practices. Most of the time I did not even realize I was already doing some of them until someone else pointed it out to me.

What would you add to this list?

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Feature: Inspirational Song of the Week

I truly believe that music has the power to change things. It can change your mood, change your opinion, and change your life if you hear the right thing at the right time. From listening in your car to hearing something performed live, music can speak across time, space, and language. Much like math, it's a universal thing that flows through everyone.

What I find particularly striking though is musical frisson. Here's where my nerdy comes out. I majored in French and International Studies (History focus) in undergrad a few moons back. I loved learning new words & ways to say things. 

The greatest challenge is translating from one language to another. Sometimes though, the definition of the word or idea can be experienced in the saying. One of my favorite experiences of this was with the word "frisson," which translates to "shiver." It just sounded like that is what it meant. 

Back to the subject at hand. Musical frisson is the chills or goosebumps you experience when you hear certain songs, chords, or melodies. The two biggest musical frisson triggers for me are: Hedwig's theme from Harry Potter and Rue's whistle from The Hunger Games.

In honor of musical frisson, and to provide some of my personal favorites, I will be featuring a song each week that has inspired me or helped me in some way. Some will be upbeat, some will be dulcet, and still others will be a bit melancholy. 

We experience a range of emotions and have thousands of thoughts every day. By allowing music to help us deal with these experiences, we can move through them and on to what we really want to do.

What songs or sounds give you inspiration?

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The Past: Acknowledging Where You Have Been

Living in the past is giving up any plans for the future. As a history major I know the importance of looking back from where we have come. That really is the best way to plan for where you want to go by means of avoiding past mistakes. What it does NOT mean is that we are doomed to repeat ourselves. Every single day is a new chance for us to make choices. I can choose to be negative about a situation or I can choose to look at it as an opportunity. I can choose to eat things out of emotion or I can choose to eat things that fuel and boost me.

However, with choice comes consequences. I am telling you, you have the power to make any choice in the world regarding most subjects. You are not free from the consequences of that choice. I'm sure you're thinking "but you just said that we can't live in the past...what if I'm experiences the consequences of a past action? Isn't that living there?" 

Honestly, the consequences of choices made can be short term or long term. Sometimes their length is up to you, other times it's not. What I am encouraging you to do is stop dwelling on those past choices. You cannot change them, no matter how much you want to. What you can do is make choices today and in the future that will mitigate or help counteract the consequences of previous choices.

You have the freedom to do what is necessary to make your life better and more brilliant than you ever imagined. The question is: are you willing to explore that freedom? I am working on my exploration every day and every day I feel like I am gaining ground. Care to join me?

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No Day but Today & Nowhere but Here

As cliche as it may sound, RENT is one of my all-time favorite stage shows. I found it via the 2005 movie and fell in love. I met my husband doing drama in high school, so we fully support the arts whenever possible. For our 7th anniversary, he took me to see a live performance and while he liked the movie, the live show gave him the good kind of chills.

"No day but today" is a refrain from one of the core songs talking about why a couple should even try because there was no way it was ever going to work out. One character was arguing that they should give up before starting and the other was arguing that we only get this one chance in life, so why not risk it? I've always loved that idea but struggled to put it into action in my own life.

I've gotten so caught up in working a job I'm decent at but don't enjoy, to pay bills that need to be taken care of, for things that I rarely get to enjoy. How much of a disappoint I am in comparison with my ideal. How did I get here? The same way everyone else did. I stopped dreaming as much, stopped being fearless, and stopped pursuing what I mattered to nourish my soul.

As disappointing as this sounds, don't lose hope. There is a way out! Starting where you are, a little at a time is all is takes to make a difference in your life. Nowhere but here. That's all that you have and where you are. Life isn't about making sweeping changes. The best and most effective changes happen incrementally, over time, at the right pace for a reason. They are sustainable and too important to rush through.

This is what I am focusing on now. My meditation app helps me focus on being present while I begin my search for my passion. I have so many things running around in my brain that are "cool" or "fun" but I'm not passionate about. I'm trying to hone in on that inner voice and work on starting where I am.

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